2 Broke Girls - 1x03 - And Strokes of Goodwill

This wasn't so bad. Still a crapload of horrible jokes, but also a bunch of decent ones, and we didn't have to write off half the entire episode like last week. There wasn't much in the way of a central plot in this one, and that actually worked to its advantage. It was more a bunch of slices of Max and Caroline's new life together, which meant we got a lot of nice character moments and non-forced humor.

Gasp! An Ethnic! And a ... goth? Wait, what year is this?

Max takes Caroline to Goodwill to find her new shoes and educate her in the wisdom of "clever bitches" at "the 'will". At first, Caroline is naturally mortified, but, as usual, she's game and starts to love the ridiculously low prices. She even manages to re-buy a pair of shoes she gave away back in her better days. Max meanwhile, finally shows a sliver of non-snarky-bitchy emotion when she finds a t-shirt that nostalgically reminds her of a Strokes concert she's got fond memories of. Unfortunately she loses said shirt to a pair of basket-snatching she-toughs. Said dangerous she-toughs seem to be a loud mouthed Hispanic girl, and some white girl with flower tattoos all over her body arms and neck. I only emphasize the flower tattoos because it's later brought up as an example of how she could be dangerous. Now it's entirely possible they aren't rose tattoos, but something truly bad ass, but I'm not gonna spend that much time zooming and enhancing for you people. Perverts.

This was the booty dance. It appeared twice. No, I will not
make a gif of it. Perverts.

To get her mind off the loss of the shirt, Caroline does a little booty dance and convinces Max to go out drinking with her. Oh is that how it's gonna be? I'm not gonna lie. This would be a much more interesting show, if it turned out to be a wacky lesbian courting story. How I Met Your Other Mother.

Don't look down on them, this is how guys bar fight in
Williamsburg, too

Unfortunately for the movie in my head, once they get to the bar, she starts flirting with future-recurring-guest-star: a ridiculously buff bartender who's a "real legit" street performer calling himself JPEG (ugh), who's obviously sporting those coke-bottle glasses as an affectation you fucking dickbag no i'm not bitter cause i actually have to wea---wait, what? Sorry, everything went red for a minute. Across the bar Caroline spots one of the Goodwill hos (the flower child) and tries to start some shit. She promptly gets her ass kicked/hair pulled for her trouble, until JPEG (ugh) comes and saves her.

The next morning, as Caroline sleeps under the watchful gaze of half a dozen fans, Max finally answers the question I've had all week, when she goes and takes Chestnut out for a walk. Thank God. I was wondering what they were doing with all the "Brooklyn" that this thing produces daily. This made sense AND was funny. Especially when we find out that she shovels the poop into Han's dumpster with her ginormous shovel. While she walks him, Max has a little chat with Chestnut about her Caroline troubles that's equal parts cringey-on-the-nose and somewhat amusing. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt on this, since she gives Chestnut a funny high pitched voice. It was an odd scene, cause you're expecting the camera to pan to Caroline, or anyone, watching this odd little exchange, but it never happens. It's just left to stand on it's own, which was kind of nice.

We end back at the diner, where Caroline finds out from Han (who's apparently been getting some trouble [hah, I didn't go for it!] about all the horse shit in his dumpster) that Caroline's been walking Chestnut and tries to thank her. Max is all aggrevatingly "yo, I don't share, I'm troubled and deep and complicated". Seriously, get another schtick. When the Paris Hilton clone is the most likeable, agreeable, and identifiable character on your show, something's gone wrong. Caroline comes through though (again), when she spots the other Goodwill Bitch and proceeds to spill Borscht all over the Strokes shirt while dropping a pretty sweet closeted-boyfriend dig. And so the girls end the ep bonding and running away from a crazy Puerto Rican chick threatening to cut them in angry Spanish.

--
Random thoughts

• Earls line wasn't as violently sucky as it was last week, but it wasn't great. Do all his lines have to be about how he's a black sex machine with all the chicks? It was funny the first two times, but let's do something with this guy. Even if it's just saying "that affluent girl who is down on her luck seems naive about the realities of living near the poverty line.
• Same for Han. He seems like a nice guy. Can we get one episode without his entire schtick being "haha he sounds funny and is only 98% proficient in English".
• Speaking of racist humor, I'm pretty sure "shoe" was not the original intended word in the line "you're trying to shoe her down." when Caroline is trying to negotiate the price of her shoes.
• A lot of the flat jokes keep falling on Kat Dennings delivery. Now it's partly because as the bankable star of the show, and the one with "attitude", she's probably tasked with most of the outright jokes. Statistically speaking, this show is gonna send her more clunkers than winners. But additionally, everything she says comes out like it's meant ironically, and when it doesn't she's made this weird choice to deliver every zinger with an implied "yo dawg, burrrn" facial movements and gestures. Both those delivery choices tend to kill otherwise passable jokes. Also, please stop saying "dope". 

Good jokes

• First off there's this great bit where Max proves what a sooper-dooper waitress she is by somehow storing every item of a table's order all over her body, Batman like. Of course then, without warning, and with both hands previously in full view, she pulls a Diet Coke out of...

..seriously, I don't think I'd drink that.

• "You're not allergic to gluten, you're just masking an eating disorder."
• "These shoes cost $900!" / "Well then that's not pain, that's karma"
• [after Caroline inquires about security cameras as the Goodwill] 
• "Camera? What do you think this is? Target?
• "♫ I wanna take my clothes off ♫" / "Might wanna keep your voice down, this building has three registered sex offenders."
• "If that's your tequilla noise, I don't want to know what your orgasm sounds like." / "Same face, no voice."

Bad jokes

• Anything by the chef
• "Well, your dad probably made that many new friends in prison." -- seriously, what was the point of this joke?
• "I don't know why I'm quoting a rapist." -- on-the-nose joke that was done much better (and converted into a running gag) on Better Off Ted
• The whole chef blowing on their faces to make up for an air conditioner. Actually, what was worse were the lines that followed:
• "That's like an AC that just had salami." -- what does that even mean?
• "There's more salami where that came from." -- ahh, it was a set-up for that. 
• "Turn your back on the rack, you're under attack." -- because I truly, in my heart, believe that is something you hear all the time at Goodwill.
• "Now that its on you, it might as well have been a Kenny G shirt. Burn!" -- no, no it wasn't.